FUNNY STORIES 4 |
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Mr. Kalle Olsson had appeared to the enrolment. But he did any- thing to be free from doing the military service. He simulated for example a very bad view. The doctor was testing Kalle's eyes very carefully, but in the end he had to admit he never before had met someone so short-sighted. Kalle was absolved. Happy about this decision he went to the movies in the night. But please find out about his terror, when he revealed the same doctor sitting next to him. No problem, he handled the situation: - Could You tell me if this train is going to Flen? The owner of a big Grand Danois was searching a veterinary to complain about his dog, that always was running and barking after cars. - That's maybe not a big deal, said the vet. I think most dogs do something like that. - Maybe, but this dog catch the cars and then burrow them in the garden. The great aeroplane was about to land somewhere in Austalia after a long flight from London. At this moment the passengers will hear the following from the loudspeakers: - This is just a record. You all have flied without a pilot. The aeroplane has only been controlled by an ultramodern, high- tech auto-pilot. When you now are about to land, you don't have to be afraid. This system has never failed, failed, failed...
should they never have done under the king of Karl XII. - Oh, my God! In those days the bread was fresh! Mr. Olsson walked to the Pressbyrån and he wondered if the Pressbyrån could press his pair of trousers. - Would it be in a fast way, the employee of Pressbyrån wondered? - No, I'll be satisfied if they're ready tomorrow. The old non-commissioned officer is telling a story about the difficulties of military preparedness period: - In those days you did it in another way. The pea soup was so thin that there were neither peases nor pork in the soup. Well, some weeks there wasn't even a Thursday.
seen, the biggest hole I've ever seen. The dentist said while he was examining his patient. - Yah! The patient said. But, do you have to repeat yourself in that way? - I didn't. You heard the echo! I'm born on the seventh day of the seventh month, living on the seventh floor at 7, Stora Gatan. That's why I put all of my fortune on horse number seven. - Did this horse win? - No, it was seventh best. There was a maneuver in the neighborhood of Runemo. A sen- tinel was located at a so-called blowed bridge. The sentinel stopped a lady who wanted to pass. - The bridge is blowed, the sentinel said. - But I can see that the bridge is full, the lady said. - No, it's blowed. The lady gazed and then she went to an other military refre- sher soldier and she said: - He over there, isn't he crazy? He says that the bridge is blowed. - O.K., I don't know anything. I've been dead for three days, the soldier answered.
- Your captain is speaking. If you look out over the right wing, you can see the wing is on fire. If you after that look out over the left wing, you can see the same thing. If you now look down below the plane, you only can see the sea. If you watch carefully at the sea, you may see a yellow spot. That's a life rescue boat. I'm on board that boat... These funny stories are from the book "1001 roliga historier" by Lars Ljungqvist, 1977 Menu |
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